All at sea today. Can’t focus or motivate myself. The cold keeps nagging away at me like dull pain. It’s no warmer. My routine is pretty settled this week, wake up cold and alone, work with a bunch of cunts I have little time for, go home to an empty cold flat. Rinse and repeat. Left my keys at work so had to get a locksmith round. I waited for him in the freezing cold foyer as couples and families scuttled by for their Friday nights together. I felt homeless and alone. I have a place I sleep in but it’s not a home, it’s just a hotel with some of my belongings in. Be strong my wife tells me so I am. Finally got in at 10PM. Drained.